1. Some people will forget to tell you they can't make it. This will throw off the final guest count you have to give the caterer. You assume people are coming when they're actually not. Those $90 chicken dinners no one's going to eat? That's a big waste of money.
2. People are confused by "regrets." If your friends and family have no idea what "regrets" means, they'll do nothing whether or not they're attending. That'll throw off your final guest count, too.
3. You miss the thrill of getting responses. Whether you eagerly open up printed RSVPs that come in the mail or get the number digitally, there's something really sweet about seeing who's responded and what they have to say. Instead of simply checking off "I am attending" or "I'm not attending," some guests will write something funny or heartwarming on their RSVPs, and that's priceless.
4. Your reception isn't like a casual backyard birthday party. For a more formal affair like a wedding, a more formal way of responding is appropriate. It's not a big time commitment for guests to check off a box—it just takes a few seconds!
5. It may mislead guests in understanding the significance of the event. Some people treat every party like their attendance is optional until the last minute, so if they feel like going they will and if they don't feel like going, they won't—it's not a big deal one way or the other. But, of course, a couple planning their wedding knows differently. Knowing an exact number of guests is a huge deal that affects how much you owe the caterer, which is one of the top wedding expenses.
6. It'll add more stress as you get into the home stretch. As your wedding day nears, the last thing you need is something else to worry about. Sending out traditional RSVPs gives you a clear-cut idea of who's coming and who's not. It also lets you to know who to follow up with because they haven't sent their RSVP in by the deadline.
by Nancy Mattia